How to Catch a Cat Read online

  More praise for the New York Times bestselling Cats and Curios Mysteries

  “Written with verve and panache.”

  —Carolyn Hart, New York Times bestselling author of the Death on Demand Mysteries

  “Quirky characters, an enjoyable mystery with plenty of twists, and cats, too! A fun read.”

  —Linda O. Johnston, author of the Pet Rescue Mysteries

  “[A] wild, refreshing, over-the-top-of-Nob-Hill thriller.”

  —The Best Reviews

  “This exciting road trip goes from danger to humor and back as the adorable cats are brilliant tacticians who amusingly but cleverly maneuver the niece somewhat for treats but often to keep her safe. Fast-paced cozy readers who enjoy something different will relish the charming Cats and Curios Mysteries as Oscar’s niece continues her dangerous adventures into the weird, whimsical world of her late uncle.”

  —Genre Go Round Reviews

  “Whimsical . . . Contains a stunning clever twist . . . Cozy readers who enjoy something amusingly, satirically different will relish this.”

  —Gumshoe Review

  “Full of quirky, yet credibly described characters . . . Intriguing . . . Doubly fun for those familiar with this beautiful city . . . This is a PURR-fect treat for feline and mystery fans alike! Warning: Like cat treats, this series may prove to be addictive!”

  —Fresh Fiction

  “[A] neatly constructed mystery . . . Cat fanciers will find plenty to love in these personified felines . . . The setting is very well drawn, old town San Francisco is well detailed, neatly blending into the more modern city.”

  —The Mystery Reader

  “The female ‘Grisham of the cozies’ weaves an intricate mystery that will delight the most critical of fans, and cat lovers will not be disappointed . . . Four Paws UP!”

  —Night Owl Reviews

  Praise for New York Times bestselling author Rebecca M. Hale’s Mystery in the Islands Mysteries

  AFOOT ON ST. CROIX

  “Hale’s novels are elaborate puzzle pieces where plots at first seem scattered and unrelated, but ultimately weave together into one surprisingly unified storyline. Complex, funny, and with darker tones that share more elements with the black-comedy mysteries written by Tim Dorsey than any cozy, Afoot on St. Croix entertains with its many self-centered characters that are flawed, but . . . all too human.”

  —Kings River Life Magazine

  “Readers will be enchanted by the setting, intrigued by the characters, and amazed by the writing in this island cozy . . . A wonderful blend of the Caribbean in every chapter.”

  —Debbie’s Book Bag

  ADRIFT ON ST. JOHN

  “Intriguing . . . Fans who want something different will enjoy being Adrift on St. John.”

  —Genre Go Round Reviews

  “[A] perfect story to escape into . . . Just when you think you have everything figured out, you don’t! Enjoy!!”

  —Escape with Dollycas into a Good Book

  “This was an easy-flowing, narrative tale that took a different path in its storytelling . . . An intriguing and adventurous jaunt on a tropical island.”

  —The Cozy Chicks

  Titles by Rebecca M. Hale

  Cats and Curios Mysteries

  HOW TO WASH A CAT

  NINE LIVES LAST FOREVER

  HOW TO MOON A CAT

  HOW TO TAIL A CAT

  HOW TO PAINT A CAT

  HOW TO CATCH A CAT

  Mysteries in the Islands

  ADRIFT ON ST. JOHN

  AFOOT ON ST. CROIX

  AGROUND ON ST. THOMAS

  THE BERKLEY PUBLISHING GROUP

  Published by the Penguin Group

  Penguin Group (USA) LLC

  375 Hudson Street, New York, New York 10014

  USA • Canada • UK • Ireland • Australia • New Zealand • India • South Africa • China

  penguin.com

  A Penguin Random House Company

  HOW TO CATCH A CAT

  A Berkley Prime Crime Book / published by arrangement with the author

  Copyright © 2015 by Rebecca M. Hale.

  Penguin supports copyright. Copyright fuels creativity, encourages diverse voices, promotes free speech, and creates a vibrant culture. Thank you for buying an authorized edition of this book and for complying with copyright laws by not reproducing, scanning, or distributing any part of it in any form without permission. You are supporting writers and allowing Penguin to continue to publish books for every reader.

  Berkley Prime Crime Books are published by The Berkley Publishing Group.

  BERKLEY® PRIME CRIME and the PRIME CRIME logo are trademarks of Penguin Group (USA) LLC.

  For information, address: The Berkley Publishing Group,

  a division of Penguin Group (USA) LLC,

  375 Hudson Street, New York, New York 10014.

  eBook ISBN: 978-1-101-60096-2

  PUBLISHING HISTORY

  Berkley Prime Crime mass-market edition / March 2015

  Cover illustration by Mary Ann Lasher.

  Cover design by Diana Kolsky.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

  Version_1

  This book is dedicated to our readers:

  It’s been a pleasure to share our adventures with you.

  —Rupert, Isabella, and Rebecca

  Contents

  Praise for Titles by Rebecca M. Hale

  Titles by Rebecca M. Hale

  Title Page

  Copyright

  Dedication

  On Board the San Carlos

  Introduction

  The Embarcadero

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  On Board the San Carlos

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Modern-Day San Francisco

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  Chapter 29

  On Board the San Carlos

  Chapter 30

  Chapter 31

  Chapter 32

  Chapter 33

  Chapter 34

  Chapter 35

  Modern-Day San Francisco

  Chapter 36

  Chapter 37

  Chapter 38

  Chapter 39

  Angel Island, near the Anchored San Carlos

  Chapter 40

  Chapter 41

  Chapter 42

  Modern-Day San Francisco

  Chapter 43

  Chapter 44

  Chapter 45

  Chapter 46

  On Board the San Carlos

  Chapter 47

  Chapter 48

  Chapter 49

  Modern-Day San Francisco

  Chapter 50

  Chapter 51

  Chapter 52

  Chapter 53

  On Board the San Carlos

  Chapter 54

  Chapter 55

  Chapter 56

  Chapter 57

  Cha
pter 58

  Two Days Before the America’s Cup Regatta

  Chapter 59

  Chapter 60

  Chapter 61

  On Board the San Carlos

  Chapter 62

  First Day of the America’s Cup Regatta

  Chapter 63

  Chapter 64

  Chapter 65

  Day Five of the America’s Cup

  Chapter 66

  Chapter 67

  Chapter 68

  Chapter 69

  Chapter 70

  On Board the San Carlos

  Chapter 71

  Chapter 72

  Last Day of the America’s Cup

  Chapter 73

  Chapter 74

  Chapter 75

  Chapter 76

  Chapter 77

  Chapter 78

  On Board the San Carlos

  Chapter 79

  On Board the San Carlos

  Off the California Coast

  August 1775

  Introduction

  A SPANISH SUPPLY ship bobbed in the Pacific swells off the California coast. Dual masts of square-shaped sails billowed in the wind, powering the ship forward as its rigging creaked and groaned under the strain.

  The San Carlos had recently departed the Mexican port of San Blas on a mission to find the ocean entrance to a protected bay that a Spanish land exploration had stumbled upon a few years earlier.

  The reported dimensions of the enormous cove didn’t match any of the geographic formations depicted on available maps. The San Carlos was searching for an opening that had been missed by several experienced explorers—a passage to a fabled bay many still doubted existed.

  It was a journey into uncharted and frequently mischarted territory, undertaken at a time when the full breadth of the Pacific had yet to be appreciated. Most navigators thought East Asia lay almost adjacent to the North American continent and that only a narrow straight separated the two landmasses.

  The path ahead lay fraught with danger and uncertainty—for both the boat’s human and feline passengers—but the San Carlos was destined to change the course of history.

  The discovery of the Golden Gate entrance to the San Francisco Bay would forever alter the settlement and colonization of America’s West Coast.

  —

  FAR BELOW THE ship’s whipping sails, a pudgy white cat with orange-tipped ears and tail skidded across the wooden deck. Claws scrambling on the wet floorboards, Rupert chased after his prey, a green parrot with a bright red head and a yellow beak.

  The boat dipped behind a swell, causing it to rock into a steep tilt, but Rupert continued his pursuit, smashing into buckets and crates as he barreled down the length of the deck.

  He reached the bow and spun around, his fluffy tail swishing through the air. The bird pulled up into a holding pattern, and Rupert sensed he was about to be mocked with a flyby.

  Not this time, Rupert thought with determination. Tensing his muscles, he crouched for an epic leap.

  Sure enough, the bird dipped his wings and feinted toward the deck. Rupert launched into the air, his front feet wildly swatting, to no avail.

  The parrot swooped upward, easily evading the cat’s swiping paws.

  Rupert landed with a wheezing thump on the deck.

  Cackling with delight, the parrot soared into the sky, his red head bobbing in and out of the sails. He landed on the rim of the crow’s nest and looked down toward the deck, smirking in triumph at another successful ruse.

  Rupert regrouped for a second attempt. He hoisted himself onto the rigging of the ship’s forward sail and quickly climbed twenty feet up the main mast.

  Intrigued, the bird fluttered off his perch. He flew a tight circle around the pole, taunting his adversary.

  Wretched creature, Rupert thought as he wrapped one paw around the mast and clawed the air with the other.

  After a few more dizzying circles, the parrot landed just out of reach, on a webbed netting that stretched beneath the nearest sail.

  His frustration mounting, Rupert released the pole and wobbled onto the net.

  This was exactly the response the parrot had hoped to elicit. He gripped his toes into the webbing and swung beneath it. For a few short seconds, he eyed the cat’s pudgy belly through the holes in the knotted ropes.

  The target was too tempting to resist.

  With a loud squawk, he bumped his head up through the netting and into the pillow of white fur.

  Rupert jumped, startled and offended. He tumbled across the net, swatting at the feathered fiend who had so rudely poked him in the stomach. But in his zeal to catch the bird, he lost his footing and rolled off the webbing.

  Luckily, the next lower sail broke his fall.

  He bounced onto the top end of the canvas sheet and slid down its length. Flailing wildly, his chunky feet caught the sail’s hem as he slipped off the edge.

  He dangled in this undignified position, swinging back and forth, until his person climbed a rope ladder and brought him down to safety.

  “Oh, Rupert,” she said with a sigh, cuddling him in her arms. “What am I going to do with you?”

  Twittering triumphantly, the parrot landed on the captain’s shoulder.

  Chalk up another win for the bird.

  —

  A SECOND CAT with similar coloring but far sleeker physique sat on the deck near the captain’s feet. She watched Rupert’s antics with minimal interest. The game had played out countless times before.

  Her brother never caught the bird. He wouldn’t know what to do with it if he did.

  Cheeky parrot, Isabella thought.

  But she resisted the urge to assist in her brother’s hunt.

  Occasionally a stray pigeon or a passing gull made the mistake of roosting on her boat. Those feathered intruders met a quick end. Petey the Parrot, however, wasn’t meant for meals. The captain had made that quite clear.

  Isabella sniffed derisively. The bird didn’t have enough meat on his bones to make him worth her effort—even if he hadn’t been declared off-limits.

  She returned her attention to the boat’s helm and the watery path ahead. She couldn’t be distracted by such nonsense; there were far more important tasks on her agenda that afternoon.

  It was her job to guide the San Carlos safely through the camouflaged entrance to the largest—and still unknown—bay on the Pacific’s West Coast.

  The Embarcadero

  Modern-Day San Francisco

  Chapter 1

  THE KNITTING NEEDLE NINJA

  AN ELDERLY MAN with short rounded shoulders hobbled along San Francisco’s waterfront Embarcadero. His pace was stilted and slow, every other step paired with the thump of a wooden cane.

  Red and white banners lined the route, part of an advertising campaign plastered across the city that promoted the America’s Cup sailboat regatta. The prestigious competition had reached its final day. After months of hoopla and weeks of racing, the two teams representing the United States and New Zealand were tied eight to eight. Whoever took the next race would secure enough points in the “best of seventeen” format to be crowned the champion.

  San Franciscans filled the Embarcadero’s wide sidewalk, a stream of newly minted racing enthusiasts anticipating the day’s matchup. Even those who had been blasé about sailing at the start of the event now eagerly joined in the fun.

  It was a typical summer morning on the bay—which meant the weather could be anything from sunny and bright to soupy and overcast. Often, a single day would showcase both extremes.

  For the moment, the city’s shoreline enjoyed a clear sky, but the wind blowing in from the Pacific carried the sharp edge of a cooling front. The red peaks of the Golden Gate Bridge had begun to feather with fog.

  Oscar looked out across the water and cracked a weary smile.

  These were perfect conditions for the regatta’s finale—and, he thought as the smile disappeared—for tracking down a serial killer.

  Unlike the rest of th
e pedestrians flocking to the America’s Cup pavilion, Oscar had little interest in the outcome of the pivotal last race.

  He was on the trail of a cunning criminal, a woman known throughout the Bay Area as the Knitting Needle Ninja.

  —

  THE COLORFUL CROWDS on the Embarcadero walked at a much faster clip than the determined old man. Oscar’s weary eyes scanned each individual and group that strolled by, all the while knowing that the Ninja might pass within inches without his detection.

  He gummed his dentures back and forth, reflecting on the Ninja’s bloody history—and her proficiency with disguise.

  The Ninja’s crimes had first come to light earlier that year. Revelations that a mayoral intern had been murdered by the former mayor’s long-serving administrative assistant had rocked San Francisco’s City Hall.

  The story had quickly captured the morbid fascination of the local news media, and it wasn’t long before an enterprising reporter came up with the alliterative nickname, the Knitting Needle Ninja. The moniker was a reference to the Ninja’s unique method of attack: a pair of knitting needles that had once been used as a weapon of self-defense on the rowdy streets of San Francisco’s Barbary Coast.